How are we doing?

Have I mentioned lately how nice it is to have found a site where people respond to me in some way other than playing armchair MD?

EllieBelleKitty

There have been times, (even tho we have not posted this) the fort has helped us NOT leave this world. There are so many good people and info and just the fact 'we' are accepted, and NOT judged has helped us!

Kaven

I am more confident than before when it comes to deciding to do what I need to do to get my needs met. Sharing my thoughts, listening to what others share, reading resource materials, being exposed to so much that I find quite inspiring has a lot do with this change of mine.

Sky

I came to the Fort with no experience of on-line communities...and more than a little trepidation. I was surprised how quickly I felt at home...felt that I belonged.

Jane

This site made me come to terms and realize quite a few different things that could seriously impact my situation in a little bit of a positive way as opposed to the constant negative impact everything has currently. It also gave me some hopefully helpful pointers that you best believe I will be attempting starting first thing in the morning.

Anonymous

internet friends are great support, much of what i experience is good connection but remember there is nothing like a rl friend, one where we can share fully. when it is time, venture out, this site is a support to building a healthy 'real' life.

Terry

I found my way here by chance and it was meant to be. The reading I have done has been helpful, I have learnt so much, had many aha moments, have had questions answered, can see a picture I'd rather not but it is real... thank you, an invaluable resource...

Sara

The courage and confidence I gained here gave me the strength to open up to people in 3d now as well, and I've learned what healthy conversations and friendships look like here.

WeepingWillow

I am excited to have found this site. I know by the fact of just reading the heartfelt poems, this is a site where others truly "have been there".

Bo248

Fort is a place where I can be myself. A place where I can admit my mistakes without being judged.

Lunateen

This site is amazing... It has so many things that could help someone. It is such an amazing place to be and everyone is so lovely.

Chloe & Co

ths pwobablee tha bes serviivrs siit mi haev fowns

Kami

A year ago today, I was in crisis. I thought that I was going to have to go inpatient, as the only way to help me through the tremendous struggles I was having with my ED and how it was affecting my health. I was actually looking for some kind of hotline or a facility when I found a list of resources on an ED website. All it had was the admin email for Fort, but I figured if there was an admin for this place, then there was a site too. I took a chance and typed fortrefuge.com into my browser, and read some of the pages. The more I read, the more I realized that I might have found what I was looking for. I didn't join right away, thought about it for a few days, and then, since I just wasn't finding any other resource that I thought might help me, I joined.

I was thinking I needed to go inpatient because I couldn't seem to find the amount of support that I knew I needed--even though I have a great T and had been seeing her for over a year--and thought that inpatient might be the only way to help myself. I've discovered over this past year, though, that peer support can be extremely helpful, in addition to professional help. Finding Fort, I found a place where I didn't have to hide. I don't have to hide my DID, I don't have to hide my abuse history, I don't have to hide the ugly aftermath of my abuse, I don't have to hide my various diagnoses, I don't have to hide who I am. Surprisingly, I found that ppl accepted me and liked me. For the first few months, I was kinda surprised at that, just because it was so far out of the realm of my experience up til then.

I think that I've learned a lot over the past year, being on Fort. I think that it's helping me heal from abuse and its aftermath in a lot of ways--even ways I wasn't even aware that I needed to heal. I feel like I've got this huge mountain still to climb, but it's nice to have support of my peers while I try to climb it. It's been really helpful to have discussions with ppl, ppl who understand how hard abuse aftermath is. It's been really fun to talk with ppl about what has and hasn't worked for them, to share ideas with each other. The support I've found here has been really invaluable to me. My T keeps saying how valuable support groups are in the healing process, and I really agree with her. I think I'd be in quite a different place emotionally had I not run across Fort.

Sometimes I wonder if I've made progress as far as healing, because what I'm working on now is some of the hardest trauma work I've ever done, but it's also the first real trauma work I've been able to do. Sometimes I wish that I'd been able to keep seeing the T I had just after I got out of the abuse. She was amazing, but she was working on helping me learn coping skills just so I could function and get through college and all the other things I had on my plate at the time. Sadly, I still miss her. I kinda wish I could somehow let her know how I'm doing now. From then until now I know there's been progress. I wonder if that's how I need to think of it--seeing how far I've come since I got out of the abuse, instead of trying to see progress at closer intervals.

The progress I've had in the past year just seems miniscule compared to what I feel I need to/should have accomplished. I guess maybe you can't rush it, though. I definitely know the pitfalls of overprocessing. Thinking about it, I think I actually am making progress though, progress I can see. A year ago, I wasn't experiencing my feelings like I am now, and even if that's the only thing I've managed to progress in, then that's enough. Expressing myself is important, and I have a feeling it's gonna be important as I go through more trauma work in T.

Guess I'm just trying to say that I'm really glad that a year ago I was at such a place that I looked for support, and stumbled in a round about way into Fort.

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