Abuse Survivors Library
10 Articles About Relationships
i.e. healthy and unhealthy relationships, how to communicate with people, how to set boundaries, how to avoid drama, how to not abuse others, etc.Relationships Chess
A lot of relationship disappointments and conflicts come from simply losing track of what the relationship is in the first place. For example, wanting sex from a friend or therapy from a spouse. Simply restating the nature of the relationship (and letting it sink) is often therapeutic on its own.Effective Listening
During abuse, listening was pointless because we couldn't trust what was said. Outside of abuse, however, the best way to understand someone is to listen to and - more importantly - hear them.Problem Solving
Three articles by Tony Schirtzinger, LCSW, on how to solve interpersonal problems. Does the problem exist? Is it significant? Is it solvable? Do you honestly want to solve this problem? Do you want to blame someone instead of solving it? Is it that you really can't or only believe so? Arguments about everything, arguments that go nowhere, and the power of the moment - the real problem solving. Priceless for abuse survivors.The Karpman Drama Triangle
The purpose of the Victim, Rescuer, Persecutor Game, why do we play it, how to break free, how to spot emotional manipulation patterns in others and yourself, difference between drama and being an adult.Tips for Attention Seekers
Everyone needs attention, and there's nothing wrong with seeking it, as long as you do it constructively. This page lists a few basic tips on how to make it work.Narcissistic Mothers
Adult daughter's perspective on what her mother is like; long, but many people relate. No solutions offered.How To Deal With A Narcissistic Mother
Practical ideas on how to make this relationship more functional and healthy, regardless of whether mom cooperates or not.Non-PD Recycle Bin & Tool Box
two very extensive lists of approaches to personality disordered individuals: things that work and things that don'tDealing With A Passive-Aggressive Manipulator
Article explaining what is passive-aggression, who engage in it and why, and 8 tips on how to handle itIt Ends With Me
Letter by an abuse survivor to her siblings and parents, sharing her perspective on the past and her feelings and hopes for the future.
A lot of relationship disappointments and conflicts come from simply losing track of what the relationship is in the first place. For example, wanting sex from a friend or therapy from a spouse. Simply restating the nature of the relationship (and letting it sink) is often therapeutic on its own.Effective Listening
During abuse, listening was pointless because we couldn't trust what was said. Outside of abuse, however, the best way to understand someone is to listen to and - more importantly - hear them.Problem Solving
Three articles by Tony Schirtzinger, LCSW, on how to solve interpersonal problems. Does the problem exist? Is it significant? Is it solvable? Do you honestly want to solve this problem? Do you want to blame someone instead of solving it? Is it that you really can't or only believe so? Arguments about everything, arguments that go nowhere, and the power of the moment - the real problem solving. Priceless for abuse survivors.The Karpman Drama Triangle
The purpose of the Victim, Rescuer, Persecutor Game, why do we play it, how to break free, how to spot emotional manipulation patterns in others and yourself, difference between drama and being an adult.Tips for Attention Seekers
Everyone needs attention, and there's nothing wrong with seeking it, as long as you do it constructively. This page lists a few basic tips on how to make it work.Narcissistic Mothers
Adult daughter's perspective on what her mother is like; long, but many people relate. No solutions offered.How To Deal With A Narcissistic Mother
Practical ideas on how to make this relationship more functional and healthy, regardless of whether mom cooperates or not.Non-PD Recycle Bin & Tool Box
two very extensive lists of approaches to personality disordered individuals: things that work and things that don'tDealing With A Passive-Aggressive Manipulator
Article explaining what is passive-aggression, who engage in it and why, and 8 tips on how to handle itIt Ends With Me
Letter by an abuse survivor to her siblings and parents, sharing her perspective on the past and her feelings and hopes for the future.
This page was last updated on August 31st, 2020
© 2008-2023 Fort Refuge. Please don't reproduce without permission.
© 2008-2023 Fort Refuge. Please don't reproduce without permission.