Fort Refuge forums and chatrooms do not substitute for crisis hotlines or professional counseling. We care, but we are a peer community, and can't offer advice, interventions, or referrals. Please see the numbers and links below: they have trained volunteers who can help.
Help if you're involved in abuse inflicted on a child (someone under 18yo) by an adult. It can be physical, sexual, emotional/verbal, or neglect.
|Emergency - 111|
|Report Suspected Child Abuse:|
Child Protective Servicesthe place to call if you're concerned about a child's safety.
1-800-843-5678 - cybertipline.orgReport online sexual exploitation of children: solicitation, trafficking, child pornography, etc - things you bump into online and have no 3D information on.
Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB)How to officially report actual or suspect abuse and neglect...includes situations where you have a mandated responsibility to do this
|Someone to talk to:|
0800 376 633 - youthline.co.nzHotline, chatline, text, and email support for youth.
0800 942 8787 - whatsup.co.nzHotline and chatline for kids, teens, and young adults.
0800 54 37 54 - kidsline.org.nzHotline for kids under 14, open 4-6PM weekdays.
0800 299 100 - skylight.org.nzTrauma, loss, and grief hotline for youth.
0800 568 856 - parenthelp.org.nzHelp with all parenting challenges from those everyday situations to the most serious issue of child abuse.
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Help if you're involved in abuse inflicted on one adult by another, while both share the same household. For example, physical abuse by an intimate partner, or abuse of elderly parent by their adult child.
|Emergency - 111|
0800 456 450 - areyouok.org.nzNational group providing resources and help for those involved in family violence (perps and victims of all genders).
0508 744 633 - 2shine.org.nzSupport, information, and referrals for men and women, young and old, victims and perpetrators; multilingual support available.
0800 733 843 - womensrefuge.org.nzNational women’s organisation committed to preventing and supporting women and children living with violence.
0800 725 463 - seniorline.org.nzInformation for older people to make decisions about staying at home, retirement villages, homecare, day care and rest homes.
0800 688 5463 outline.org.nzsupport for LGBTQI+ community.
hotpeachpages.netInternational directory of 3d help available to victims of domestic violence: shelters, lawyers, therapy, child care, support groups, etc.
workandincome.govt.nzbenefit finder, to see which benefits you qualif for.
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Hotlines, chatlines, find-a-therapist, various other organizations that can help if you're struggling with mental health but aren't acutely suicidal.
|Emergency - 111|
|Someone to talk to:|
0800 211 211 (social services)
0800 299 100 (trauma, loss and grief; 9-5PM weekdays)
0800 14 269 4389 (Anxiety)
0800 611 116 - health.govt.nzAssessment and triage, health advice, and information on health services throughout New Zealand.
talkingworks.co.nzdirectory of mental health professionals in New Zealand.
mentalhealth.org.nzList of 24/7 services offering support to those dealing with mental health and related issues...includes emergency and hot line details.
0800 111 757 (or text 4202) - depression.org.nzHotline and resources for those experiencing depression.
0800 269 4389 - anxiety.org.nzAnxiety helpline.
0800 732 825 - supportingfamilies.org.nzHelp for families and whanau supporting a loved one who has a mental illness.
familybudgeting.org.nzDetails to access on line and face to face budgeting help. Also to access useful resources and videos.
7cups.com24/7 free one on one chat about anything that bothers you, with someone who will listen unconditionally.
BetterHelp.comonline counseling by US-licensed mental health professionals, $35-70 per week flat price, talk to your counselor as much or as little as you wish: through messages, chat, voice, or video chat.
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phoneFort Members and Visitors
What we offer, how to contact us, guidelines, FAQ, TOS, lost passwords, etc
IntroBasic info on what is abuse and how Fort is supposed to help with the aftermath of it.
What we offerAll the stuff we have here at Fort at a glance.
SitemapList of all the pages on this website.
Public ForumNo registration necessary, feel free to post as much or as little as you wish. Helpful for those who don't really want to join our community at this time, and for those who can't, for example secondary survivors.
GuidelinesCommunity rules, good to read if you're considering joining us.
Terms of ServiceLegal stuffs.
Chats' scheduleTimes, locations, and topics of next hosted chats.
Lost passwordsLink to recover your account password if you forgot it.
FAQAll sorts of questions on how to use forums and chat: where to post, how to change your signature, what are the castles, why do people get banned, etc.
Speak To ModsOpen to registered users only - a place to reach moderators if something makes it uncomfortable for you to use the site: someone is bothering you, you can't find your inbox, aren't sure why your post was moved, etc. Posts are visible to you and mod team only, and it's the best way to communicate with us.
Contact usA way for you to get in touch with site admins; please keep in mind that we are not counselors, we only maintain this site.
No site works for everyone; if Fort isn't a good match for you, see if the sites below might work better.
7cups.comInstant chat with a "listener" about anything that bothers you. You can become a listener too, if you want to. Would work a lot better than Fort if you want to chat NOW, are looking to talk to people one-on-one, and like to give/receive advice. It's against our guidelines to tell anyone what to do, think, or feel - we believe in letting people make their own choices.
malesurvivor.orgWe have a lot of male members at Fort, but some things can feel too awkward to discuss in a mixed gender community. If that's how you feel - malesurvivor.org is a busy site that has men only, so you can have some privacy for those extra sensitive issues.
christiansurvivors.comOnline community for Christian survivors of any form of abuse. We recognize that faith is a powerful healing tool for many people, but Fort is a non-denominational site, many of us have had bad experiences with religion, so we limit all religious references to one forum folder only. If you like to bring up religion in most conversations (or if you're just more comfortable with people of the same faith) - christiansurvivors.com might be a good solution.
pandys.orgGreat site for survivors of rape or child sexual abuse: busy community and very good resources. Guidelines differ from Fort: no DID allowed, telling others what to do is encouraged, blocking people who get on your nerves is not allowed, foul language is OK within reasonable limits; there's a forum for supporters (aka secondary survivors) too.
survivorship.orgCommunity for survivors of ritual abuse, mind control, and torture. Membership is paid, but the site has some free resources too. We have a forum folder for religious abuse, but you have to be actively participating in other forums for a month to gain access to it, and the topic is off-limit in chat. Moreover, we believe that, although abuse perps often claim to have supernatural powers or secret technologies to manipulate your mind, in reality "mind control" is just not possible.
loveshack.orgCommunity focused on relationships, including (but not limited to) abusive ones. If you don't really want to leave your partner, but just have problems with how you're being treated (e.g. s/he lies, cheats, drinks, plays computer games too much, etc) - or if you're heartbroken after a breakup and don't know if you'll ever find love again - loveshack.org is a good place to discuss these issues.
psychopathfree.comCommunity dedicated to discussing psychopaths/narcissists in your life: learning to spot them, guesstimating what they are thinking and why they act the way they do, finding ways to manipulate their behavior, etc. We do not believe in this at Fort, and it's against our guidelines to talk of anyone other than yourself, so if this is what you're into - psychopathfree.com would be a better match.
suicideforum.comPro-life community focused on mental health, depression, and suicide prevention. Membership is free and anonymous, open to anyone over 13yo. Suicide threats or descriptions of SI not allowed.
It is good to rub and polish our brain against that of others.
~ Michel de Montaigne
This page was last updated on September 27th, 2017
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