Child Abuse Information and Support

There's a lot of research on long-term effects of child abuse. www.childwelfare.gov has great information, for example. It is a fact that child abuse can cause very serious issues in survivors, sometimes lasting a life-time. If you know of a child being abused, please skip to hotlines, make that call right now, protect the child. As the saying goes, it shouldn't hurt to be a kid.

If you, like many of us here at Fort Refuge, are an adult survivor of childhood abuse - you've come to the right place. You might be wondering what are the common child abuse types, trying to understand whether what happened to you qualifies as abuse. Or maybe you're beyond the initial stage of questioning your past and are simply looking for a support group for child abuse survivors. Whatever the case is - we're glad you found us, and hope that Fort Refuge will help you in your healing journey, whether you'll get the hotline number and never come back, or join our child abuse chat rooms and forums and develop close friendships with us for a few years.

Many of us are adult survivors of child abuse - we understand just how hard it can be to heal from its long-term consequences, from low self-worth to PTSD, anxiety disorders, troubles with employment and/or relationships, or any other issue caused by traumatic past. We are here to offer you non-judgemental support, validation of your feelings, peer advice (if wanted) - in other words, a safe and friendly place for your healing and personal growth.

Below are basic signs of various types of child abuse to look out for (borrowed from www.childwelfare.gov), and hotlines and helplinks. Feel free to browse our abuse survivors library for further reading.

Types of Child Abuse

The following are some signs often associated with particular types of child abuse and neglect: physical abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, and emotional abuse. It is important to note, however, that these types of abuse are more typically found in combination than alone. A physically abused child, for example, is often emotionally abused as well, and a sexually abused child also may be neglected.

Signs of Physical Child Abuse

Consider the possibility of physical abuse when the child:

• Has unexplained burns, bites, bruises, broken bones, or black eyes
• Has fading bruises or other marks noticeable after an absence from school
• Seems frightened of the parents and protests or cries when it is time to go home
• Shrinks at the approach of adults
• Reports injury by a parent or another adult caregiver

Consider the possibility of physical abuse when the parent or other adult caregiver:

• Offers conflicting, unconvincing, or no explanation for the child's injury
• Describes the child as "evil," or in some other very negative way
• Uses harsh physical discipline with the child
• Has a history of abuse as a child

Signs of Child Neglect

Consider the possibility of neglect when the child:

• Is frequently absent from school
• Begs or steals food or money
• Lacks needed medical or dental care, immunizations, or glasses
• Is consistently dirty and has severe body odor
• Lacks sufficient clothing for the weather
• Abuses alcohol or other drugs
• States that there is no one at home to provide care

Consider the possibility of neglect when the parent or other adult caregiver:

• Appears to be indifferent to the child
• Seems apathetic or depressed
• Behaves irrationally or in a bizarre manner
• Is abusing alcohol or other drugs

Signs of Sexual Child Abuse

Consider the possibility of sexual abuse when the child:

• Has difficulty walking or sitting
• Suddenly refuses to change for gym or to participate in physical activities
• Reports nightmares or bedwetting
• Experiences a sudden change in appetite
• Demonstrates bizarre, sophisticated, or unusual sexual knowledge or behavior
• Becomes pregnant or contracts a venereal disease, particularly if under age 14
• Runs away
• Reports sexual abuse by a parent or another adult caregiver

Consider the possibility of sexual abuse when the parent or other adult caregiver:

• Is unduly protective of the child or severely limits the child's contact with other children, especially of the opposite sex
• Is secretive and isolated
• Is jealous or controlling with family members

Signs of Emotional Child Abuse

Consider the possibility of emotional maltreatment when the child:

• Shows extremes in behavior, such as overly compliant or demanding behavior, extreme passivity, or aggression
• Is either inappropriately adult (parenting other children, for example) or inappropriately infantile (frequently rocking or head-banging, for example)
• Is delayed in physical or emotional development
• Has attempted suicide
• Reports a lack of attachment to the parent

Consider the possibility of emotional maltreatment when the parent or other adult caregiver:

• Constantly blames, belittles, or berates the child
• Is unconcerned about the child and refuses to consider offers of help for the child's problems
• Overtly rejects the child

Links, hotlines, and Resources for Child Abuse

• Stop It Now! 888.PREVENT(888.773.8368) Who They Help: Child sexual abuse victims, parents, offenders, concerned individuals
• Covenant House Nineline: 1-800-999-9999 Crisis line for youth, teens and families. Locally based referrals throughout the United States. Help for youth and parents regarding drugs, abuse, homelessness, runaway children, and message relays. Operates 24 hours.
• National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-4ACHILD TDD: 1-800-2ACHILD Provides multilingual crisis intervention and professional counseling on child abuse. Gives referrals to local social service groups offering counseling on child abuse. Has literature on child abuse in English and Spanish. Operates 24 hours.
• Parents Helping Parents: 1-800-882-1250: A self-help program for parents who want to improve their relationships with their children. PHP relies on specially trained volunteers from professional health and human services to help guide discussions, suggest referrals to other services, and provide assistance when needed.
• Boys Town National Hotline: 1-800-448-3000 TDD: 800-448-1833 For children and parents in any type of personal crisis. Trained counselors will provide help in abusive relationships, parent-child conflicts, pregnancy, runaway youth, suicide, physical and sexual abuse. Operates 24 hours.
• Child Welfare Information Gateway: Formerly the National Clearinghouse on Child Abuse and Neglect Information and the National Adoption Information Clearinghouse
• bacaworld.org - Bikers Against Child Abuse International - a non-profit organization that exists to provide aid, comfort, safety, and support for children that have been sexually, physically, and emotionally abused. BACA is dedicated to the principle that one of the basic rights of childhood is to be safe and protected, and when the childs family and environment have failed them, BACA stands ready to provide it to them.

IT IS NOT OKAY!

Sites created by Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse:

• The Mighty Phoenix: Many Good resources. Owned by Marie Waldrep, a long time campaigner against sexual violence.
• Inocencia Interrumpida: Wonderful Spanish site for survivors of child sexual assault
• The Jayc Foundation, Inc - support and services to ensure the timely treatment of families that are recovering from abduction and the aftermath of other traumatic experiences. Founded by Jaycee Dugard, survivor of abduction at the age of 11 that lasted for 18 years.

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